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3 key things and 1 attitude to improve your marriage on a daily basis

A few minutes dedicated exclusively to loving each other is like the daily itv that even the best of marriages need.

Tomas Melendo Granados by Tomas Melendo Granados
June 16, 2023
in Family, Foreground
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3 key things and 1 attitude to improve your marriage on a daily basis
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A touch of affection at the beginning of the day

When you wake up, or when you “start to be a person” (with your first coffee, for example), take a few minutes to think about what a special touch of affection you are going to have that day with your spouse; write it down in the cell phone’s address book, activate the alarm… and don’t turn it off until you have put it into practice.

Think for a moment how this firm decision is enough to give your whole day a radically different and much more joyful direction than it would have had if you lived it without the purpose of increasing your love.

If you start and continue each day with your head and heart bent on making your wife or husband happy:

  1. How much nonsense disappears immediately or doesn’t even come up at all!
  2. How many occasions will you discover to overcome yourself for the love of him or her and your children!
  3. How many tasks will you take up again with new energy, the task that you have in hand and that is getting harder and harder!
  4. How much you will long for the reunion… if only to discover the face of happiness you provoke in those you love the most!

If you start and continue the day with the illusion of ending it more in love with your spouse… everything acquires new, more pleasant and attractive nuances!

Three sincere expressions of gratitude

That is, three sentences in which you expressly and clearly thank your spouse for some of the many things he or she does for you every day that you don’t even notice… because you “take them for granted”.

Yes, you need to be looking for those expressions of love from your spouse towards you throughout the day (remember the beginning of the film Fiddler on the Roof, and the different ways of expressing his and her love!), you will be filled with optimism, you will discover a lot of reasons why it is worth living your marriage to the fullest, instead of focusing your attention on the things that are not going well, on the problems, on the difficulties, on your own and other people’s defects… and thus making your life miserable!

Expressly thanking for the services you have received:

  1. will renew your joy, remembering that these are concrete expressions of love for you;
  2. will make your spouse enjoy it, as he or she will feel recognized for his or her efforts;
  3. He/she will reward you, as if on the rebound, because the happiness you have brought him/her will also make him/her take care of you and multiply his/her attentions.

In this way, you will feed the “circuit of gratitude and joy”, encouraging a repeated feedback, tremendously beneficial for your marriage and for your family as a whole.

Expressly saying thank you, every day, for three loving touches from your spouse… can move you from the grayest of pessimism to an optimistic realism that values the best in your life and marriage.

Five minutes dedicated exclusively to love you

Yes, to love you… and exclusively!

Do not allow that in those 5 minutes (or 10 or as many as you can manage daily) include either work problems, nor children’s problems, nor between you… or with the in-laws… or any other kind of problem!

Do not grant yourselves any complaint, any protest, even if you have “more than enough reasons” to complain or to blame yourselves for so many “things that do not go”.

It is about making each other’s life as pleasant as possible, as intensely as possible, leaving aside everything that could cloud those magical minutes.

It is about dedicating a few minutes to love each other, exclusively!

A few minutes dedicated exclusively to loving each other is like the daily itv that even the best of marriages need.

The attitude?

The constant striving (not necessarily the effort, because it ends up coming out on its own, as you make it a good habit) to take advantage of everything – absolutely everything – to love your husband or wife more.

The illusion, fed from very early on, to end the day more in love with one’s own spouse.

A life insurance for… a happy marriage!

Our marriage will “work” if you and I wake up every day with the illusion of ending it more in love with our spouse.

Tags: familyloveMarriage
Tomas Melendo Granados

Tomas Melendo Granados

Tomás Melendo Granados was born in Melilla, Spain in 1951. PhD in Science Education and PhD in Philosophy. He carried out undergraduate and graduate studies at Navarra’s University and completed them in Italy and Germany. Until his retirement in September 2021, he was Director of the Study of the Family at Malaga’s University. Now, they are taught by Edufamilia (a nonprofit organization he runs) and can be done completely online. Together with his wife, he was appointed as member of the Pontifical Council for the Family by Pope Benedict XVI. He is father of seven children, grandfather of thirteen grandchildren and, above all, as he defines himself, a husband who is deeply and increasingly in love of his wife.

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