Among the many accolades offered to faithful fathers through the years, two presidential proclamations stand out for me personally. One was by President George W. Bush.
Fathers have indispensable roles to play in the lives of their children: provider, protector, nurturer, teacher, and friend. Every caring father unconditionally loves his sons and daughters and strives for the best for his children in the future. In seeking to give their children the opportunity to succeed, fathers offer needed strength, guidance, and discipline.
Fathers teach their children many basic things in life: how to read a book, throw a ball, tie a necktie, ride a bike, or drive a car. More importantly, they also help instill time-honored values in their children, such as hard work, respect, honesty, and good citizenship. Through their words, actions, and sacrifices, fathers play an important role in shaping the characters of their sons and daughters.
The time and attention that a father gives to a child is irreplaceable—there is no substitute for the involvement and commitment of a responsible father. Not only are fathers essential to the healthy development of children, they also influence the strength of families and the stability of communities.
Like the ideal father President Bush describes, my dad taught me how to throw a baseball, tie a necktie, ride a bike, and drive a car. And he taught me by example the value of hard work, respect, honesty, and good citizenship. As a provider, protector, nurturer, teacher, and friend, he did indeed offer strength, guidance, and discipline to our family.
Dad passed away several years ago, leaving a legacy that continues to inspire me. After serving in the Eighth Air Force during World War II, he went to college, met and married Mom, and they had me, their first of seven children. I was about three when we went to live in South America where Dad had a lucrative job with an international oil company, and we lived—as our home movies show—in a posh mansion with servants.
The downside was that Dad had to be away a lot, sometimes weeks at a stretch. As he returned from one of his trips, I hid behind Mom’s skirt, apparently unsure of who this man was. It broke Dad’s heart, and he decided to leave the company. They pleaded with him to stay, offering huge rewards and advancement that would eventually lead to top management in New York. It would mean, however, more long absences from our family, and it was a price Dad was unwilling to pay. He chose us over money and prestige, and, in the language of Robert Frost, that has made all the difference.
With that big decision and a million small ones, Dad became the kind of father touted by President Bush and by his predecessor President Reagan, who proclaimed,
Through acts of courage, of selflessness, and of love, fathers have lifted, inspired, and blessed the lives of those around them. It is fathers who have such a major role in giving their children guidance, leadership and direction and teaching them integrity, truth, and humility.
Children will forever remember the father who is devoted to his family, anxious for their welfare, proud of their successes, and whose example is a beacon to them. He has left them with memories that have enriched and molded their lives…
Every father rises to his tallest stature as he selflessly cares for his family, his wife, and his children. Our finest fathers have come to know what Martin Buber meant when he wrote that our treasure is hidden beneath the hearth of our own home.
Ironically, as Father’s Day is being celebrated around the world, fatherlessness is at an all-time high. Wade Horn has called it “the most disturbing and consequential social trend of our time.” In the words of David Popenoe, “disappearing dads are destroying our future.” We appeal to absent and errant fathers to come home and find the treasure hidden beneath the hearth of your own home. Meanwhile, the situation calls for all of us to reach out to the children of those disappearing dads and, as Ecclesiasticus says, “be as a father unto the fatherless.”
We express our profound gratitude to faithful fathers everywhere, and also to the selfless single mothers and other caregivers who, as expressed in our World Family Declaration, provide opportunities for children “to develop physically, mentally, morally, spiritually and socially in a healthy and normal manner and in conditions of freedom and dignity.” And as we stated in that declaration,
We call for a culture that honors and enables faithful, fulfilling, and resilient marriages; that recognizes and protects the uniquely valuable contributions of both mothers and fathers to the lives of their children; and that encourages the values and vision necessary for young people to look forward to and prepare for successful marriage and parenting.