{"id":114128,"date":"2022-01-13T04:58:06","date_gmt":"2022-01-13T09:58:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ifamnews.com\/?p=114128"},"modified":"2022-01-13T15:02:15","modified_gmt":"2022-01-13T20:02:15","slug":"going-platonic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ifamnews.com\/en\/going-platonic","title":{"rendered":"Going Platonic"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

What happens when you feel closer to your best friend than to any romantic partner you\u2019ve ever dated? Or when you\u2019re not really interested in marriage, but want to build a life with someone<\/em>?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019re April Lexi Lee and Renee Wong, you enter a \u201cplatonic life partnership.\u201d In a USA Today<\/em> profile<\/a> earlier this week, the couple argued for normalizing other definitions of love. Their relationship, they say, is just as if not more committed, respectful, and strategic than a marriage\u2014but completely lacking any romantic or sexual component. The couple defines their partnership as \u201ca deep platonic love and also a commitment to each other, like marriage, where we are trying to build the next step for our lives together,\u201d including things like a joint bank account, buying a house together, and even starting a family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Another couple profiled in the piece\u2014Jay Guercio and best friend Krystle\u2014go one step farther. The couple \u201cplatonically married\u201d in November 2020, and now raise an adopted son together. (Lee and Wong each have dating lives of their own, but are clear that their first commitment is to each other.) Says Guercio, \u201cWe want to raise kids the same way. We have the same ideas as [to] what finances should look like. We are already symbiotic in how we work. . . . it just made sense to start building the life that we wanted to live together.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Counselor and sexologist Cyndi Darnell tells USA Today<\/em> that in her opinion, platonic partnerships \u201ccan \u2018absolutely\u2019 be as successful as a traditional marriage, because \u2018partnership is based on shared values.\u2019\u201d Other supporters of the idea of platonic marriages or life partnerships argue that their reasons for entering these arrangements are far more stable and enduring than mere sexual or romantic attraction.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What are we to make of this? We can all acknowledge that friendship is great. If two people want to be friends, pursue a friendship with intentionality, maybe even be roommates or buy a house together, more power to them. The part of this story that should disturb us are the words \u201cmarriage\u201d or \u201clife partnership.\u201d These couples aren\u2019t just trying to be friends. They\u2019re trying to imitate the best of marriage, in a relationship that is decidedly not <\/em>a marriage. They\u2019re watering down the meaning of the word even further, by stripping it of its erotic or creative potential. And they\u2019re involving not only themselves, but any children who may somehow or other find their way into these households\u2014in spite of decades of research demonstrating that a married, mother-father household is the best arrangement for the well-being of children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Our societal views on love are disordered in a way that only Plato himself could explain.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What happens when you feel closer to your best friend than to any romantic partner you\u2019ve ever dated? Or when you\u2019re not really interested in marriage, but want to build a life with someone? If you\u2019re April Lexi Lee and Renee Wong, you enter a \u201cplatonic life partnership.\u201d In a USA Today profile earlier this […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":29,"featured_media":114129,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"give_campaign_id":0,"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"mc4wp_mailchimp_campaign":[],"jnews-multi-image_gallery":[],"jnews_single_post":{"subtitle":"","format":"standard","video":"","gallery":"","source_name":"","source_url":"","via_name":"","via_url":"","override":[{"template":"1","single_blog_custom":"","parallax":"1","fullscreen":"1","layout":"right-sidebar","sidebar":"default-sidebar","second_sidebar":"default-sidebar","sticky_sidebar":"1","share_position":"top","share_float_style":"share-monocrhome","show_share_counter":"1","show_view_counter":"1","show_featured":"1","show_post_meta":"1","show_post_author":"1","show_post_author_image":"1","show_post_date":"1","post_date_format":"default","post_date_format_custom":"Y\/m\/d","show_post_category":"1","post_reading_time_wpm":"300","zoom_button_out_step":"2","zoom_button_in_step":"3","show_post_tag":"1","show_prev_next_post":"1","show_popup_post":"1","number_popup_post":"1"}],"image_override":[{"single_post_thumbnail_size":"crop-500","single_post_gallery_size":"crop-500"}],"trending_post_position":"meta","trending_post_label":"Trending","sponsored_post_label":"Sponsored by","sponsored_post_name":"","sponsored_post_url":"","sponsored_post_logo":"","sponsored_post_desc":""},"jnews_primary_category":{"id":"695"},"jnews_social_meta":{"fb_title":"","fb_description":"","fb_image":"","twitter_title":"","twitter_description":"","twitter_image":""},"jnews_override_counter":{"view_counter_number":"0","share_counter_number":"0","like_counter_number":"0","dislike_counter_number":"0"},"footnotes":""},"categories":[804,805,695],"tags":[427],"class_list":["post-114128","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-breaking-news","category-foreground","category-opinion","tag-marriage"],"yoast_head":"\nGoing Platonic - IFN<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"These couples aren\u2019t just trying to be friends. 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King is the Managing Editor of IOF's journal, The Natural Family: An International Journal of Research and Policy, the United States\u2019 leading journal of family-policy research. In that capacity, she writes, edits and corresponds with editors and contributors to ensure that each issue provides the most relevant and accurate research and policy analysis available. Nicole holds a B.A. in English as well as M.A.s in English and Political Theory. She has contributed to The Front Porch Republic and Chronicles: A Magazine of American Culture, among others. 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